A Little Good, A Little Bad
This started out to be a post about my three-month anniversary, back in mid-July. But that time has passed. I’ll just note it here in passing and move along. It’s been a minute since I last posted. I’ve been having some trouble controlling my hands and arms due to a nerve pinch in my spine. It’s frequently either too painful to type or I shake so much that I can’t hit the right keys or I double-tap.The more trouble I have mechanically typing, the more my concentration gets overwhelmed and I have trouble thinking of what I wanted to say. This is hardly ideal for a person who fancies himself a writer.
I’ve been trying to figure out if this condition has been coming on for years, or if it’s just come on suddenly. I have been looking back at thee last couple years, trying to focus on all the times I have been sidelined by pain in my hands and shoulders. I’ve come to the conclusion it’s actually a good healthy dose of both. I am sure that it has gotten a lot worse over the last couple months, but I am also convinced that part of the beauty of getting my new heart is the realization that, with the heart starting to feel a little better, my attention has been freed up to focus on the other ways my ship of state is falling apart.
Anyway, after a set of x-rays, two CTs (both of which confirmed what we already knew from the x-rays) and the superfun push/prod “does it hurt when I press here? How about here? Describe the pain, is it sharp or dull, does it affect just one area, etc.? I got this answer: We know it’s probably an nerve pinch, most likely at C4/C5 because that’s the poinnt of the spine that affects your arms and hands. Prognosis: it’s going to get a little worse, hopefully not a lot worse for a while, and then it should go away. It’ll come back from time to time, and you’ll have the pain, but maybe it won’t be so bad you won’t be able to use your hand for writing, carrying anything that weighs more than a sandwich, or only be able to eat things that can be picked up by hand and eaten because your hands shake so bad you can’t get anything to your mouth with a fork or spoon. I’m going to get an MRI in the next couple of weeks. Maybe that’ll shed some light on exactly where the pressure is and whether or not they can do anything non-surgical to fix it.
I’ll tell you right now what I told every doctor, nurse practitioner, or anyone else who brought up surgery: When it gets so bad I can’t sit up, get out of bed, or take a dump, then I’ll let someone cut into my spine. And I can be thankful for most of the doctors who told me that if surgery is not an option, there are going to be intermittent periods of the rest of my life when it will suck being me.
Maybe I’ll try acupuncture.
Well, since you were so kind to sit through the bad news portion of this post, I’ll dive right into the good news. I’ve been doing cardiac rehab for a month now, and I’ve got a long way to go (a long, long way to go) but I am seeing improvement. My time for each segment of exercise has gone from 7–8 minutes when i first started out to 15–20 minutes for each segment.My LDL is comfortably in the good range. My LDL is a bit higher than they want it to be and my triglycerides are in need of serious attention, but my overall cholesterol levels are in the “fair” range. That’s better than “poor” or “time to update your will-you’ll need it in the next 4–6 months.”
I realize to anybody in good or even decent health my level of tolerable activity seems really rather small. Certainly nothing to crow about. Stairs, which were the bane of my existence when I first came home, are now not usually a problem. The last 4–6 weeks they’ve been more of a challenge because of my nerves. For some reason, going down a flight of stairs can cause my nerves to send a shooting lightning bolt down my arm. It makes it impossible to touch anything, especially the handrail, because my fingers still feel like they’re on fire. The pain takes up all my focus and it drains my energy, leaving me lightheaded and a little disoriented until I look around and realize I’m in my own home, on my own stairs, there’s a lovely cuppa to be had as soon as I get down to the kitchen.
But I’m starting, little by little, to get my life back. When I go to the grocery store, if I’m only getting a couple things and I don’t have to hunt down every aisle I can forgo the little electric cart and walk to do my shopping. One of my big goals right now in recovering is not having to ride those silly little carts that move at a snail’s pace and are impossible to get around all the pallets, special displays and sad little baskets of things that haven’t sold for so long that if they don’t move from that basket to some patron’s shopping bag soon they’ll be sent to the Island of Misfit Foods and Personal Products.
Another goal, as you know is to get back on a bike. I’m hoping to find a way to get an e-bike, so I’ll have a rescue source if I ride so far I don’t have the air and the muscle to get back home. They’re not cheap, they basic models seem to run around $800–1000; the more high-powered and better equipped rides can go upwards of $10,000 all the way to $18,000 and more if you want one with the same luxury label the more exotic cars have. (HINT: I don’t.)
For now, I’m concentrating on getting a little farther, or upping my speed a little, you know, small steps.
I have a lot more I want to say, but it’s getting late and my hands are starting to hurt too much to tap the keyboard. I suppose I’ll try posting more smaller posts, rather than not getting anything out there because I can’t finish my magnum opus.
I don’t like having to ask for money, but it’s kind of absolutely necessary. I’m not going to Chicago every week now, but I do go every two weeks to a month. Even with all the discounts I can pile on, a hotel room still costs around $225–350 a night, valet is another $60. It’s a lot more expensive to eat out than it is to eat at home. I’m still paying off about $27,000 in debt for the transplant. Plus all the aftercare and follow-up visits, weekly blood draws, $400 a month prescription costs. And this new nerve problem will wind up costing me at least a few thousand more.
I know so many of you have helped before. I am eternally grateful. Now I am praying that others will help by contributing what ever amount they feel they can spare. I’ve burned through all my savings at this point, so we’re living paycheck to paycheck. I’m attaching a link to my GoFundMe page. Please, help if you can. Thanks.
I’ll be back in the next few days with more news. Namaste.
